The next song is The Bones of You.  The syncopated rhythm battles the 3 vs 2 and the instrumentation makes me think of a hurried reverie if there is ever such a thing.  The pace of the lyrics of this song reminds me of trying to tell of a dream before you forget it.  To be 500 years ago and 3000 miles awa while all at the same moment of time could only exist in the mind of a “sleepwalking teenager;” the feelings of such a teenager told from an adult’s voice.

Mirrorball comes back to a more cinematic idea with it’s instrumentation.  One is almost able to see a lil boy riding his bike down the street at the start of some 80s coming of age movie, most likely starring Fred Savage or played against the movie “Big.”  And it’s almost like a coming of age because everything changes for the singer once he’s fallen in love.  The Mirrorball idea also makes me think back to the movies of seeing the kid graduate to a car with a mirror ball hanging from rearview mirror.  The lyrics themselves almost fade into the repetition of the melody line presented within the song.  The vocals are as soft as the kiss described in the opening lyrics, so soft as not to wake a baby.

The next song changes the pace by being more of a coffee house blues song…Grounds for Divorce.  It’s a drinking song that drives you to sing along as if you are also being dragged into the “hole in the (singer’s) neighborhood, down which of late (you too) cannot help but fall.”  You fall into the driving groove of the song and sing along as loud as possible.  Also makes me smile as the band self promotes with the line “Monday’s is for drinking to the Seldom Seen Kid.”

http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=iL4mywCOJXA

Josh Homme should be taking notes with the song of “An Audience with the Pope,” as it just oozes sex appeal.  The singer of Queens of the Stone Age and Them Crooked Vulture could easily cover the song but wouldn’t have to change much to it.  As much as the singer is trying to demonstrate such power with having “An audience with the pope and saving the world at 8″ the guy is completely broken down by the missing love of his obsession.  This obsession doesn’t seem to be repricotated due to the fact that she seems to be missing.  Yet the singer is adament of if the woman needs him, “everybody is gonna have to wait.”  I almost envision (if this hasn’t happened already) the song done as a tango or some other romantic dance on “Dancing with the Stars.” 

http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=S4d7oMxsBMI

The next song, Weather to Fly, seems to be a weaker song than some of the others and really feels more like a prelude to the next song “the loneliness of a tower crane driver.”  This song is deceiving with the title because it’s more of a celebrity’s lonely life being lifted by their fans only to be high up like a tower crane.  You have no where but to fall.  The singer pleads for prayers from being so high.

The Fix, the next song, is one of my favorites on the album because it reminds me so much of Leonard Cohen.  Between the lyrics and melody lines, is a dark themed song that could easily be a new song for any movie villian.  You almost can picture the singers (with guest Richard Hawley) twirling really bad evil moustaches.  It’s such a delightful piece of art which also references local culture in referencing the Donahue Sisters are going to meet the men in France.  Such appeal to the song…making one love to be bad

Some Riot basically is a questionable hopefuly song, in that times are tough and the singer hopes that his friend can start singing again.  It’s a look at the news, it’s a look at all the badness of the previous song and hoping for answers of a better day.  It’s such a melancholy song and makes you almost regret loving the previous song…but not quite.

The hope comes through with next song.  “One Day like This” is back to feeling light, feeling a change back to good.  It almost reminds me of a happy-go-lucky song that you would hear from old school U2 with it “looking like a beautiful day.”  The strings and poppiness of the song is to make you forget sadness and see the silver lining.  “If you think I winked, I did.”  It’s just that it’s a good mood song.  “Kiss me when my lips are thin, because holy cow, I love your eyes…..So throw those curtains wide, One day like this a year’d see me right.”  Only takes one day to be put back on the right track.

The last song is Friend of Ours.  The album becomes a friend of yours and you don’t want the last song to be over.  The singer states he’s not “very good at goodbyes.”  It’s a man to man type of song, a farewell to arms.  It’s a respectful song but sorrow drips from the singer’s lips.  It’s a see you next time.  And it’s not a hope you buy my album type of song.  It’s just a hope you enjoyed the album and hope you continue to enjoy the music we put out.  I’m completely in love with Elbow.

One of the songs that has been taking residence in my head has been “Down by the Water” by the Drums.  I think it’s mainly been a whole narrative that has been playing in my head and that’s been Ophelia’s death.  I almost feel like the song is what Hamlet would have felt, of course, if he was set in this day and age, or would have wished he had stated to her so that it wouldn’t have led to her suicide.    Yet, those thoughts of remorse and regret can’t happened without her tragedy coming true.  I don’t know if it’s because the melody and voice resembling much to the Pixies which leads to thoughts of the song “Wave of Mutilation” from the soundtrack of “Pump up the Volume” back to teen suicide of “Heathers” being tied together by mixed thoughts of Christian Slater and one of the bestest quotes “I love my dead gay son.”  I think it’s time I stepped away from the keyboard before I go on reference overload.

This lead to discussions of other musical artists that died before reaching real success.  Bradley Nowell of Sublime died before the release of the first album.  Now, if he hadn’t died, he probably would continue with the drug binging and the music wouldn’t have changed style much.  I deduced that he would have most likely end up on a season of Celebrity Rehab with Dr. Drew.  A similar hypothesis could probably been applied to Shannon Hoon from Blind Melon.  We didn’t talk about John Lennon or Jimi Hendrix.  John Lennon made his mark on music and not that I wish him dead but it seems wrong to talk about him living because then he would have overshadow the works of both his sons who have done good with music.  As far as Jimi, I’ve always thought he somewhat pre-overrated.

With all said and done, who is to say it was fate or free will that brought the suicidal thought to Kurt Cobain.  All I can say is that I’m almost more thankful that he lead the musical life he did and didn’t get dragged out the way of Michael Jackson.

The movie overall wasn’t bad but it wasn’t great.  I’m glad I went to it as a first showing as that was even cheaper than the matinee price (although heftier than a dollar theater.)  Through the religious undertone (or overtone however you view the moral of the story) lies in the theme that things aren’t as they always appear.  This movie seemed to be as it appeared.  I almost feel like M. Night must have been inspired by knowing the story behind Prince’s “Let’s Go Crazy” in which he was originally gonna use the word Devil but replaced it with elevator in the line ‘de-elevator brings you down.’  The trailer alone let us know that one of the people inside would be a devil and that people were dying one by one.  None of the characters actually grew although one of the leads (if there were any lead characters) was somewhat brought to forgiveness through the story.

While I am sometimes a film snob, I do like the occasional bad horror flick.  This movie was more than an “eh” but not by much.  I won’t be buying it when it comes out on DVD but I may not change the channel when it comes on late on TV in the future.

I wear purple today not only as support against anti-gay bullying but also in support against hate crimes all together.  Matthew Shepard and Brandon Teena were bullied for being different, so much so that they were murdered.  I don’t think the idea of wearing purple today is sensationalizing those that took their lives due to the bullying.  I believe it is to show support that the bullying should stop so that more do not suffer or kill themselves.  It’s a simple of a preventative act rather than glorifying.  This is a noble cause. 

There have been other causes against suicide that pick their own venue on how to cast the mirror on it, such as the movie Heathers.  Dark Comedy as it may be, suicide is a permanent solution to a temporary problem.  Try to step in and help before the memorial starts for a best friend that you didn’t even know how been that depressed.  Signs aren’t always easy.  Yes, anger will be there as part of the grief process but this is a spirit trying to branch through the darkness.

Try and tolerate those that want to see an end to the bullying through teaching, trying to change the system in place and overall publically showing support.  While my friend is entitled to his opinion, I hope he will read this and also understand mine.

Political standing: I’m a conservative liberal who mainly votes on the democratic side.  I am a black sheep in my family in this case as most of my relatives are more conservative and republican.  I like getting the emails regarding how horrible taxes are, etc.  My parents kind of raised me that if you want something, it doesn’t usually come for free.  Where I want better schools, roads, etc, I know that the money is gonna have to come out of my pocket.

Women’s rights: I’m pro-choice.  Because I’d rather not have one myself but would not deny someone else of their right, I’m pro-choice.  I really wanted to put this one up mainly due to a bumper sticker my husband and I saw yesterday.  It stated “God is pro-life.”  I asked my husband how do I respond when I don’t know how I feel about God.  I loved his response in that he stated if God was pro-life then there wouldn’t be miscarriages.  Having recently suffered our second one, this really hit me to heart.

Gay rights:  I’m for gay marriage.  I have always been for gay rights I think in my heart.  Maybe it’s because I don’t rely on a religious document or what not for my compassion but I look down to one of the simplest teachings I had as a child about treating others as you would like to be treated.  How can I deny a love to others if I want love for myself even if it goes by a different name?  I cannot judge polygamists in this manner either but I’d really don’t understand the need for multiple wives when mistresses are just as good *wink*

NRA: I’m not a big fan.  I like Eddie Izzard’s comments about Guns don’t kill people, people kill people and monkeys do too, if they have a gun…While I’ve had venison and even went hunting with my dad on occasion as a child, it’s not something I’m fond of and I really wish that there was better gun control.  Yet I do believe in the right to bear arms as long as people also don’t mind that I really don’t want a gun in my house.  I don’t like them and wouldn’t know how to use one in the best way (I don’t mean the point and shoot, I also mean the respectfulness a gun requires and its maintenance) so I wouldn’t be the best person to have one.

Universal Healthcare: this is a pro in my book.  Again, I don’t mind paying the taxes to get it here.  Also I already have HMOs telling me that while I get to “choose” who I want to see, it still has to be off a certain list of doctors.

Religion: Right now, I have a lot of anger still brewing.  I have defenses up for when I’ll have co-workers telling me that it was God’s will for my miscarriage or that God has a plan for me.  I have tinkered with pantheistic views.  Right now, my anger clouds any needing for resolution on why things happen or to have faith or positivity.  Something bad happened regardless if it was fated or not and it breaks my heart and pisses me off.  Judgments made in the name of a faith that is supposed to be of love do not sit well with me and I’d rather walk away from that type of associations.

I think that’s all I have in me for today.  I apologize that I don’t think I’ll be stepping off soapboxes anytime soon.

On Sunday, my husband’s grandfather died.  He was 90 years old.  He lived a great life and we knew it had been just a matter of time because he had been put in the hospital just the week prior.  On Monday, I went into see the doctor.  My husband and I had been expecting our first child with our second pregnancy.  Our first pregnancy had ended in a miscarriage last year.  I wanted to get the ok to fly for the funeral.  Again, there was no heartbeat and I have suffered my second missed miscarriage.

My husband is great to me and kind and strong.  I wish I had his strength.  I wish I had his faith and understanding but alas I’m hollow.  I don’t want people to be kind and feign understanding and sympathy while they get to tuck away in their homes with their children.  My anger feeds me more than food.

All I can do now is turn to him, escape into words and movies and music and try to feign my own comfort.

We own two orange tabbys, Peanut and Ginger.  Peanut pretty much is an older cat who is not greatly fond of Ginger if we are looking but likes her, loves on her, etc when he thinks we can’t see.  Ginger is a camera ham diva who does not fear Peanut and views him as a plaything to taunt and torment and then look cute.

I had been nagging my SO for years about getting a Littermaid since they do not like to clean up after the boxes and I currently can’t due to health reasons.  So FINALLY we got one.  My SO told me since I was the one who wanted it so badly that I needed to put it together.  After inventing cuss words I didn’t know, it finally got put together but since I got the one for multi-cats, it didn’t fit where we normally have the litter box.  Fine.  Then the rebellion began.

It started off slow where it sounded like the cats were actually using the box.  But soon, puddles of cat urine was found on the bathroom floor covered with clothes that had been left in there.  This was the work of Peanut the spy, who on occasion had acted out when the litter box hadn’t met to his standards.

When the littermaid still remained there, Peanut because the bomber, leaving poop stations around the apartment.  My SO pleaded that the cats must be scared of the automatic box.  Insert the idiot that I am.  I had Ginger, the apparent soldier, in my arms.  As I walked closer to the Littermaid, she began to freak out.  Then the attack.  She dug into my right hand and my right arm with her back claws (as both cats have their front paws declawed).  As I’m trying to put her down, the SO pipes up, “Don’t drop her!”  I finally place her down, but it’s still close to the Littermaid so she scrambles away while I’m in pain and bleeding.

The SO played nurse and attended to my wounds, while stating, “That thing is going back!”  The cats won their rebellion.  I finally saw the doctor a few days after to get my tetanus shot and some antibotics in which the doctor had looked at the bandaids and called me out as a Drama Queen with my SO egging him on.  Yeah, I’m so loved.

The cat has finally started to love up on me while I can feel my hand again.  Most of the swelling has gone down and my hand will prolly now have problems whenever the weather shifts.  Thus ended the Littermaid Rebellion of 2010.